Come On Artie Let's Go Party

Elphaba asked for a list of the party gods so she knew who had her back next time she was out. 

There are so many freaky deaky gods and goddesses this would take me forever. Since this is not my job and you people don't pay me; I am going to stick to the original twelve Olympians.

First, let me break them down for you:

Zeus, Hera, Poseidon, Demeter, Athena, Hestia, Apollo, Artemis, Ares, Aphrodite, Hephaestus and Dionysus. 

Hades - while part of this group didn't actually hold a seat on the pantheon because he mainly hung out in his underground realm.. a partier? .. meh.. while he was a bit of a bad boy - he was too much of an introvert to be considered a 'party animal'.  (FYI... BEST Hades depiction EVER - James Woods)

Back to the twelve.

Artemis 

Goddess of the Hunt. Taking a vow of chastity and living alone in the mountains with nature.. 

Not a Partier.

However, she is the twin sister of... 

Apollo!

He is one of the most popular gods, and is actually found that his stories extend further beyond most of the other pantheon lords of Greek and Roman descent and on into the more northern stretches of Celtic 

religions as the Sun god he is also the god of music, poetry and medicine...

... translation: 

Sex Drugs and Rock n Roll!.

Apollo - Partier.

Hera 

Wife of Zeus and just really too busy chasing down and smiting all his trysts she had little time to party. 

Not a Partier.

Poseidon.. 

Mmmm..my personal god crush. 

Maybe it's that Triton.. don't know he just seems like a god who gets shit done.  You know you can count on him.

Always had a bit of a thing for Poseidon... He rules the ocean... also god of horsemen (ah.. yes now it makes sense don't it?) he's like the Olympian Horse Whisperer. *sigh* 

Yes he really is all that. ... but a partier?... Let's find out shall we?

Like his older brother he likes to mess around with us mortal ladies...(EEeee!) occasionally using disguises he fathered a slew of children... 

He created damaged goddesses too. One story we all know: 

She, a priestess of Athena, the virgin goddess. He, Poseidon, king of the sea. 

Poseidon completely loses all sense of control after seeing her and how beautiful and witty with her curvy if slightly rotund and oh hang on.. wrong notes. erhm.

After spotting this lovely lass, he seduced her and they continued a very discrete and passionate affair meeting in the temple after hours. 

During one of their trysts in the middle of the temple, on the floor under the alter they were discovered by *dum dum DUM* Athena herself! 

After kicking Poseidon back to the sea - the enraged Athena turned on her fallen priestess, Medusa.. and CURSED her turning her into the monster we know today as the snake-haired temptress that turns gazes of men to STONE. 

Another story that shows a bit more of his inhibitions... is of a woman he lusted after named Caeneus. A gorgeous woman with a terrible tragic past you can imagine. So beautiful no man could resist her, she endured and fled many terrible encounters surviving capture, rape and slavery. 

She tried disguising herself as a man.. but was so beautiful she still fooled only a few. Poseidon saw her as such and became.. enamoured. He followed her, seduced her and then later after having his way with her, he granted her wish and made her a powerful male warrior so she could never be raped again. 

Poseidon also took many male lovers, one of which was Zeus' grandson Pelops. Poseidon gifted him with a flaming chariot.  hehe flaming. 

Oceans, Horses, Triton and Orgies...

Posedion - Partier.

speaking of parties.. what say we all book a sub here when it opens?

http://www.poseidonresorts.com/poseidon_main.html 

(This is so freaking cool I totally am doing this when I win the lottery! )

Demeter. 

Goddess of grain. Life death marriage.. blah blah blah... 

Not a partier. 

(Her daughter Persephone created a bit of a stir up though.. )

Athena: the virgin goddess. UBER powerful.. she rules wisdom, justice, arts, maths...

 BO-RING. 

While she did have a wicked temper... was still considered fair and just. 

Not a Partier.

Hestia

Another virgin goddess. (I'm sensing a trend) goddess of the home and hearth. 

Not a Partier.

Ares

god of war. 

Mmmm ... le sigh... He liked to fight - a LOT.  But like all the gods it seems he sired a lot of bairns with and without his main squeeze Aphrodite. Overall he seems to be a hot headed brawler and a bit of a rake.

Someone I'd party with... but not want to be responsible for.

Partier. 

Aphrodite.. the goddess of Love, Beauty and Sexuality. 

Every man wants her 

Every girl wants to be her.

Partier...goes without saying really.

*side note: I did use the Roman imagery here only because image searches of Aphrodite even with safe search on were a little too uhm.. not safe.

Hephaetstus

Wow what a contradiction this guy was! 

god of technology.. fire and iron..and atotal mama's boy...a real honest to goodness greek geek.

He's lame figuratively and literally. First he gets himself thrown off mount Olympus by his dad (Zeus)

 for siding with his mother (Hera) in a typical Saturday night parental throw down.. he lives from this point forward with a very severe limp. 

When he did manage to land a hottie he lands Aphrodite... who just can't stay faithful..(nor be expected I mean come on she's the goddess of Love and sex and all things erotic) 

One day he catches her and Ares and throws a metal net he made over them (clever boy right? - wrong!) he drags the copulating couple to mount Olympus to 'out' them to the other gods. 

Oh good grief Heph who did you think you were talking to? 

The gods laugh at him..   finally Poseidon (remember how he's a man that gets shit done? oh yeah) steps in and settles every one down.. he convinces Heph to divorce Aphrodite and just move on... so he does..all the way down from mount Olympus to a volcano... (can you say creepy basement dwelling ex?)

Not a Partier.

Dionysus .. der...the god of wine andecstasy.  

Just your standard total debauchery kind of deity... 

Dionysus is the god that gave King Midas his touch.

Funny story actually... see one of Dionysus friends.. gets drunk and wanders off aimlessly - LOST. Midas finds him.. takes care of him.. and Dionysus finally catches up and grants him his wish.. it goes on from there but but basically starts out as a screenplay for Hung Over III 

PART-EH-ER!

(I think of him as a bit of a Jim Morrison type)

Finally... The biggest and baddest, the main party bad boy, total naughty god of them all.. 

Zeus. 

King of all gods, ruler of the skies, thunder lightening and justice. 

He wrote the law and the law won.

He was notorious for coming into women's bedrooms disguised as their earthly lovers and messing around and leaving them knocked up. In his wake trail a long long list of progeny both gods and demi gods. 

He has a Temper.. loves a good party... takes care of business and looks f'n awesome in a toga.

Zeus - Partier.

and Billy Connelly has to play Zeus at some point. I mean c'mon!

Which God or Goddess are you? Your Result: Zeus Greek King of the Gods You are a powerful leader. You like to manipulate life to your own accord. You have many lovers. You like to rule over those who are powerless against your advances.
Aphrodite Greek Goddess of Love
Dionsyus Greek God of Wine
Ares Greek God of War
Hades Greek God of the Underworld
Artemis Greek Goddess of the Hunt
Which God or Goddess are you? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

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